Dregs Report

Woman with Go-Getter Attitude Crushed by Single Libertarian Party Affiliate Meeting

CANTON, GA — Local marketing professional and self-described “doer” Tessa Marks, 33, entered her first Libertarian Party affiliate meeting Wednesday…

May 22, 2025

World Leaders Revealed to Be Ageless Demonic Entities Sustained by Human Suffering; Your Neoliberal Friend Says “That’s a Good Thing, Actually”

Defense Think Tank Analyst Casually Refers to Eastern Europe as “The Chessboard” at Happy Hour

Wife of Professional Marxist Slips in Yet Another Passive-Aggressive Jab at Middle-Class Friends for Having Money

Couple Who Take Edibles and Order Uber Eats Every Night Say They Don’t Want Kids Because Their Life Is “Already Full”

Atheist Consoles Grieving Mother by Reminding Her It’s All Just a Series of Chemical Reactions

Christian Open Mic Night Erupts After One Comic Repeats “Atheists Be Debatin’” for Five Straight Minutes

Must Read

Woman Threatens to Ruin Her Own Life Until Living Wage Guaranteed to All Workers

May 22, 2025

Libertarian Chapter Celebrates Another Month of Uncompromised Purity After Rejecting All Newcomers

May 22, 2025

Local Libertarian Announces Bold Plan to “Outreach to the Urban Community” While Pulling Pants Up to Just Below Nipples

May 22, 2025

Atheist Consoles Grieving Mother by Reminding Her It’s All Just a Series of Chemical Reactions

May 22, 2025

Libertarian Comes in 8th in 3-Way Race; Mathematicians Puzzled but Say the Numbers Check Out

LUBBOCK, TX — In what experts are calling “arithmetically improbable but technically correct,” Libertarian city…

May 27, 2025

Politics

Post-Libertarian Claims He’s Evolved Beyond Left vs. Right, Now Just Angry at Everyone Equally

May 22, 2025

Anarcho-Libertarian Has Every Answer for Society’s Problems, Still Can’t Get Anyone to Swipe Right

May 22, 2025

Religion

Anglican Priest Accidentally Preaches Entire Sermon from The Silmarillion; Congregation Too Polite to Interrupt

May 25, 2025

Mega Church Unveils Drive-Thru Baptism for Busy Believers on the Go

May 22, 2025

“Religion Is Cringe,” Says Man With Rick and Morty Tattoo

May 22, 2025

Latest News

Libertarian Party Devastated to Lose Ballot Access for Race They Had No One Running In

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Libertarian Group Chat Leaked, Members Revealed to Be Even Bigger Nerds Than Anyone Thought Possible

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New Strategy Proposed: Libertarians Urged to Maybe Not Put Biggest Weirdos Front and Center; Roundly Rejected, Immediately Booed

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College Student Takes Someone’s Seat, Performs Land Acknowledgment to Justify It

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BREAKING: Paleontologists Confirm T. Rex Was Actually Kind of a Giant Pussy

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Local Tankie Sues for Defamation Using Legal System They Publicly Denounce as Bourgeois Tool of Oppression

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Libertarian Shocked by 27th Straight Election Loss After Spending Entire Campaign Giving Speeches to Other Libertarians

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Thomas Massie Suggests Returning to Spending Levels From Just Five Minutes Ago; Republicans Denounce Him as Lunatic Extremist

2 Min Read