Dregs Report

Woman with Go-Getter Attitude Crushed by Single Libertarian Party Affiliate Meeting

CANTON, GA — Local marketing professional and self-described “doer” Tessa Marks, 33, entered her first Libertarian Party affiliate meeting Wednesday…

May 22, 2025

College Marxist Assumes Yet Another Ethnic Identity

Defense Think Tank Analyst Casually Refers to Eastern Europe as “The Chessboard” at Happy Hour

Libertarian Group Chat Leaked, Members Revealed to Be Even Bigger Nerds Than Anyone Thought Possible

Couple Who Take Edibles and Order Uber Eats Every Night Say They Don’t Want Kids Because Their Life Is “Already Full”

“Religion Is Cringe,” Says Man With Rick and Morty Tattoo

Man Derives Meaning from Life by Explaining That Life Has No Meaning

Must Read

Libertarian Affiliate Applauds Year of Denunciations, Procedural Drama, and No Observable Impact

May 24, 2025

Longtime Libertarian Committee Member Launches Into Tirade Over 25-Year Ballot Access Failure, Blames New Guy for “Bad Optics”

May 22, 2025

College Student Takes Someone’s Seat, Performs Land Acknowledgment to Justify It

May 22, 2025

Local Libertarian Announces Bold Plan to “Outreach to the Urban Community” While Pulling Pants Up to Just Below Nipples

May 22, 2025

Local Libertarian Announces Bold Plan to “Outreach to the Urban Community” While Pulling Pants Up to Just Below Nipples

SPRINGFIELD, MO — Longtime Libertarian Party committee member and self-appointed outreach strategist Carl Denman, 63,…

May 22, 2025

Politics

Neoliberal Friend Says U.S. Foreign Policy ‘Generally Goes Pretty Well’ Despite Trail of Smoldering Craters

May 23, 2025

Libertarian Comes in 8th in 3-Way Race; Mathematicians Puzzled but Say the Numbers Check Out

May 27, 2025

Religion

Mega Church Unveils Drive-Thru Baptism for Busy Believers on the Go

May 22, 2025

Calvinist Takes Credit for Choosing to Attend Church, Briefly Forgets Everything He Believes

May 22, 2025

Anglican Priest Accidentally Preaches Entire Sermon from The Silmarillion; Congregation Too Polite to Interrupt

May 25, 2025

Latest News

International Affairs Grad Student Takes on Six-Figure Debt to Learn to Hate Russia

2 Min Read

Woke Dweeb Wins “Post-Libertarian Recruiter of the Year” for Turning Off Dozens of Normal People Every Month

2 Min Read

Libertarian Party Officials Celebrate “Perfect” County Platform, Shocked to Discover Everyone Still Finds Them Unlikable

3 Min Read

Thomas Massie Suggests Returning to Spending Levels From Just Five Minutes Ago; Republicans Denounce Him as Lunatic Extremist

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World Leaders Revealed to Be Ageless Demonic Entities Sustained by Human Suffering; Your Neoliberal Friend Says “That’s a Good Thing, Actually”

2 Min Read

Wife of Professional Marxist Slips in Yet Another Passive-Aggressive Jab at Middle-Class Friends for Having Money

2 Min Read

Man Blames Loneliness on Capitalist Alienation, Still Hasn’t Washed Sheets in Seven Months

2 Min Read

Christian Open Mic Night Erupts After One Comic Repeats “Atheists Be Debatin’” for Five Straight Minutes

2 Min Read