Dregs Report

Woman with Go-Getter Attitude Crushed by Single Libertarian Party Affiliate Meeting

CANTON, GA — Local marketing professional and self-described “doer” Tessa Marks, 33, entered her first Libertarian Party affiliate meeting Wednesday…

May 22, 2025

Defense Think Tank Analyst Casually Refers to Eastern Europe as “The Chessboard” at Happy Hour

College Marxist Assumes Yet Another Ethnic Identity

Libertarian Group Chat Leaked, Members Revealed to Be Even Bigger Nerds Than Anyone Thought Possible

Couple Who Take Edibles and Order Uber Eats Every Night Say They Don’t Want Kids Because Their Life Is “Already Full”

Man Derives Meaning from Life by Explaining That Life Has No Meaning

Pastor Accidentally Left at Soup Kitchen After Volunteer Event When Congregation Mistakes Him for Homeless Man

Must Read

Defense Think Tank Analyst Casually Refers to Eastern Europe as “The Chessboard” at Happy Hour

May 22, 2025

World Leaders Revealed to Be Ageless Demonic Entities Sustained by Human Suffering; Your Neoliberal Friend Says “That’s a Good Thing, Actually”

May 23, 2025

Woman Who Married Young and Just Got Into Progressive Politics Reminds You for the 17th Time This Week That She’s Actually Queer

May 22, 2025

Woke Dweeb Wins “Post-Libertarian Recruiter of the Year” for Turning Off Dozens of Normal People Every Month

May 22, 2025

Pragmatic Libertarian Shocked to Learn He’s Just as Annoying in Government as Out of It

WESTWOOD HILLS, MO — Newly elected libertarian Councilman Derek Mallon, 38, was stunned this week…

May 22, 2025

Politics

New Strategy Proposed: Libertarians Urged to Maybe Not Put Biggest Weirdos Front and Center; Roundly Rejected, Immediately Booed

May 23, 2025

Libertarian Shocked by 27th Straight Election Loss After Spending Entire Campaign Giving Speeches to Other Libertarians

May 22, 2025

Religion

Atheist Consoles Grieving Mother by Reminding Her It’s All Just a Series of Chemical Reactions

May 22, 2025

Calvinist Takes Credit for Choosing to Attend Church, Briefly Forgets Everything He Believes

May 22, 2025

Anglican Priest Accidentally Preaches Entire Sermon from The Silmarillion; Congregation Too Polite to Interrupt

May 25, 2025

Latest News

Anarcho-Libertarian Has Every Answer for Society’s Problems, Still Can’t Get Anyone to Swipe Right

3 Min Read

Open-Borders Libertarians Create Ellis Island-Style Processing Station to Vet New Party Volunteers

2 Min Read

Libertarian Affiliate Applauds Year of Denunciations, Procedural Drama, and No Observable Impact

3 Min Read

Woman Threatens to Ruin Her Own Life Until Living Wage Guaranteed to All Workers

2 Min Read

Libertarian Party Devastated to Lose Ballot Access for Race They Had No One Running In

2 Min Read

Longtime Libertarian Committee Member Launches Into Tirade Over 25-Year Ballot Access Failure, Blames New Guy for “Bad Optics”

2 Min Read

“Religion Is Cringe,” Says Man With Rick and Morty Tattoo

2 Min Read

Christian Open Mic Night Erupts After One Comic Repeats “Atheists Be Debatin’” for Five Straight Minutes

2 Min Read