Dregs Report

Woman with Go-Getter Attitude Crushed by Single Libertarian Party Affiliate Meeting

CANTON, GA — Local marketing professional and self-described “doer” Tessa Marks, 33, entered her first Libertarian Party affiliate meeting Wednesday…

May 22, 2025

Libertarian Party Devastated to Lose Ballot Access for Race They Had No One Running In

College Marxist Assumes Yet Another Ethnic Identity

Couple Who Take Edibles and Order Uber Eats Every Night Say They Don’t Want Kids Because Their Life Is “Already Full”

Wife of Professional Marxist Slips in Yet Another Passive-Aggressive Jab at Middle-Class Friends for Having Money

Man Who Hates Church Totally Fine with Witch Stuff for Some Reason

“Religion Is Cringe,” Says Man With Rick and Morty Tattoo

Must Read

Broke Marxist Threatens to Stop Paying Rent “Until Palestine Is Free”

May 22, 2025

Libertarian Party Officials Celebrate “Perfect” County Platform, Shocked to Discover Everyone Still Finds Them Unlikable

May 22, 2025

Anglican Priest Accidentally Preaches Entire Sermon from The Silmarillion; Congregation Too Polite to Interrupt

May 25, 2025

Thomas Massie Suggests Returning to Spending Levels From Just Five Minutes Ago; Republicans Denounce Him as Lunatic Extremist

May 28, 2025

Anarcho-Libertarian Has Every Answer for Society’s Problems, Still Can’t Get Anyone to Swipe Right

WEST, TX — Local anarcho-capitalist Brandon Kessler, 24, has spent the better part of his…

May 22, 2025

Politics

Libertarian Shocked by 27th Straight Election Loss After Spending Entire Campaign Giving Speeches to Other Libertarians

May 22, 2025

Libertarian Chapter Celebrates Another Month of Uncompromised Purity After Rejecting All Newcomers

May 22, 2025

Religion

Mega Church Unveils Drive-Thru Baptism for Busy Believers on the Go

May 22, 2025

Atheist Consoles Grieving Mother by Reminding Her It’s All Just a Series of Chemical Reactions

May 22, 2025

Man Derives Meaning from Life by Explaining That Life Has No Meaning

May 22, 2025

Latest News

World Leaders Revealed to Be Ageless Demonic Entities Sustained by Human Suffering; Your Neoliberal Friend Says “That’s a Good Thing, Actually”

2 Min Read

Local Tankie Sues for Defamation Using Legal System They Publicly Denounce as Bourgeois Tool of Oppression

2 Min Read

Libertarian Affiliate Applauds Year of Denunciations, Procedural Drama, and No Observable Impact

3 Min Read

Christian Open Mic Night Erupts After One Comic Repeats “Atheists Be Debatin’” for Five Straight Minutes

2 Min Read

Open-Borders Libertarians Create Ellis Island-Style Processing Station to Vet New Party Volunteers

2 Min Read

Man Blames Loneliness on Capitalist Alienation, Still Hasn’t Washed Sheets in Seven Months

2 Min Read

Calvinist Takes Credit for Choosing to Attend Church, Briefly Forgets Everything He Believes

1 Min Read

Woman Who Married Young and Just Got Into Progressive Politics Reminds You for the 17th Time This Week That She’s Actually Queer

2 Min Read