Dregs Report

Woman with Go-Getter Attitude Crushed by Single Libertarian Party Affiliate Meeting

CANTON, GA — Local marketing professional and self-described “doer” Tessa Marks, 33, entered her first Libertarian Party affiliate meeting Wednesday…

May 22, 2025

World Leaders Revealed to Be Ageless Demonic Entities Sustained by Human Suffering; Your Neoliberal Friend Says “That’s a Good Thing, Actually”

Libertarian Party Devastated to Lose Ballot Access for Race They Had No One Running In

Libertarian Group Chat Leaked, Members Revealed to Be Even Bigger Nerds Than Anyone Thought Possible

Wife of Professional Marxist Slips in Yet Another Passive-Aggressive Jab at Middle-Class Friends for Having Money

“Religion Is Cringe,” Says Man With Rick and Morty Tattoo

Christian Open Mic Night Erupts After One Comic Repeats “Atheists Be Debatin’” for Five Straight Minutes

Must Read

Woman Threatens to Ruin Her Own Life Until Living Wage Guaranteed to All Workers

May 22, 2025

Calvinist Takes Credit for Choosing to Attend Church, Briefly Forgets Everything He Believes

May 22, 2025

Defense Think Tank Analyst Casually Refers to Eastern Europe as “The Chessboard” at Happy Hour

May 22, 2025

Libertarian Party Officials Celebrate “Perfect” County Platform, Shocked to Discover Everyone Still Finds Them Unlikable

May 22, 2025

Libertarian Shocked by 27th Straight Election Loss After Spending Entire Campaign Giving Speeches to Other Libertarians

SPRINGFIELD, IL — Gerald Whitmore, 68, a buttoned-up libertarian fixture who has been running for…

May 22, 2025

Politics

International Affairs Grad Student Takes on Six-Figure Debt to Learn to Hate Russia

May 22, 2025

Neoliberal Friend Says U.S. Foreign Policy ‘Generally Goes Pretty Well’ Despite Trail of Smoldering Craters

May 23, 2025

Religion

Pastor Accidentally Left at Soup Kitchen After Volunteer Event When Congregation Mistakes Him for Homeless Man

May 22, 2025

Atheist Consoles Grieving Mother by Reminding Her It’s All Just a Series of Chemical Reactions

May 22, 2025

Man Derives Meaning from Life by Explaining That Life Has No Meaning

May 22, 2025

Latest News

Astronomers Spot Three Gray Pixels a Million Light-Years Away, Confidently Declare It’s Dust From a Failed Star With Complex Feelings About Gender

2 Min Read

Pragmatic Libertarian Shocked to Learn He’s Just as Annoying in Government as Out of It

2 Min Read

Local Tankie Sues for Defamation Using Legal System They Publicly Denounce as Bourgeois Tool of Oppression

2 Min Read

Man Blames Loneliness on Capitalist Alienation, Still Hasn’t Washed Sheets in Seven Months

2 Min Read

Knitting Club Passes Bold Resolution Condemning Bad Things, Supporting Good Things; Leadership Says It’s a Turning Point

2 Min Read

Libertarian Chapter Celebrates Another Month of Uncompromised Purity After Rejecting All Newcomers

2 Min Read

Man Who Hates Church Totally Fine with Witch Stuff for Some Reason

2 Min Read

Broke Marxist Threatens to Stop Paying Rent “Until Palestine Is Free”

2 Min Read