Dregs Report

Woman with Go-Getter Attitude Crushed by Single Libertarian Party Affiliate Meeting

CANTON, GA — Local marketing professional and self-described “doer” Tessa Marks, 33, entered her first Libertarian Party affiliate meeting Wednesday…

May 22, 2025

Defense Think Tank Analyst Casually Refers to Eastern Europe as “The Chessboard” at Happy Hour

International Affairs Grad Student Takes on Six-Figure Debt to Learn to Hate Russia

Libertarian Group Chat Leaked, Members Revealed to Be Even Bigger Nerds Than Anyone Thought Possible

Wife of Professional Marxist Slips in Yet Another Passive-Aggressive Jab at Middle-Class Friends for Having Money

“Religion Is Cringe,” Says Man With Rick and Morty Tattoo

Man Who Hates Church Totally Fine with Witch Stuff for Some Reason

Must Read

Local Libertarian Announces Bold Plan to “Outreach to the Urban Community” While Pulling Pants Up to Just Below Nipples

May 22, 2025

Libertarian Party Devastated to Lose Ballot Access for Race They Had No One Running In

May 22, 2025

Atheist Consoles Grieving Mother by Reminding Her It’s All Just a Series of Chemical Reactions

May 22, 2025

Libertarian Shocked by 27th Straight Election Loss After Spending Entire Campaign Giving Speeches to Other Libertarians

May 22, 2025

World Leaders Revealed to Be Ageless Demonic Entities Sustained by Human Suffering; Your Neoliberal Friend Says “That’s a Good Thing, Actually”

GENEVA — In a joint press conference that tore open the veil of reality and…

May 23, 2025

Politics

Open-Borders Libertarians Create Ellis Island-Style Processing Station to Vet New Party Volunteers

May 28, 2025

Local Tankie Sues for Defamation Using Legal System They Publicly Denounce as Bourgeois Tool of Oppression

May 22, 2025

Religion

Calvinist Takes Credit for Choosing to Attend Church, Briefly Forgets Everything He Believes

May 22, 2025

Man Derives Meaning from Life by Explaining That Life Has No Meaning

May 22, 2025

Christian Open Mic Night Erupts After One Comic Repeats “Atheists Be Debatin’” for Five Straight Minutes

May 22, 2025

Latest News

Couple Who Take Edibles and Order Uber Eats Every Night Say They Don’t Want Kids Because Their Life Is “Already Full”

2 Min Read

Man Blames Loneliness on Capitalist Alienation, Still Hasn’t Washed Sheets in Seven Months

2 Min Read

New Strategy Proposed: Libertarians Urged to Maybe Not Put Biggest Weirdos Front and Center; Roundly Rejected, Immediately Booed

2 Min Read

Thomas Massie Suggests Returning to Spending Levels From Just Five Minutes Ago; Republicans Denounce Him as Lunatic Extremist

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Broke Marxist Threatens to Stop Paying Rent “Until Palestine Is Free”

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Podcaster Claims He Was Shadowbanned, Actually Just Super Boring

2 Min Read

College Student Takes Someone’s Seat, Performs Land Acknowledgment to Justify It

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Longtime Libertarian Committee Member Launches Into Tirade Over 25-Year Ballot Access Failure, Blames New Guy for “Bad Optics”

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