Dregs Report

Woman with Go-Getter Attitude Crushed by Single Libertarian Party Affiliate Meeting

CANTON, GA — Local marketing professional and self-described “doer” Tessa Marks, 33, entered her first Libertarian Party affiliate meeting Wednesday…

May 22, 2025

International Affairs Grad Student Takes on Six-Figure Debt to Learn to Hate Russia

World Leaders Revealed to Be Ageless Demonic Entities Sustained by Human Suffering; Your Neoliberal Friend Says “That’s a Good Thing, Actually”

Wife of Professional Marxist Slips in Yet Another Passive-Aggressive Jab at Middle-Class Friends for Having Money

Couple Who Take Edibles and Order Uber Eats Every Night Say They Don’t Want Kids Because Their Life Is “Already Full”

Christian Open Mic Night Erupts After One Comic Repeats “Atheists Be Debatin’” for Five Straight Minutes

Pastor Accidentally Left at Soup Kitchen After Volunteer Event When Congregation Mistakes Him for Homeless Man

Must Read

Woman Who Married Young and Just Got Into Progressive Politics Reminds You for the 17th Time This Week That She’s Actually Queer

May 22, 2025

Local Tankie Sues for Defamation Using Legal System They Publicly Denounce as Bourgeois Tool of Oppression

May 22, 2025

Calvinist Takes Credit for Choosing to Attend Church, Briefly Forgets Everything He Believes

May 22, 2025

Libertarian Affiliate Applauds Year of Denunciations, Procedural Drama, and No Observable Impact

May 24, 2025

Open-Borders Libertarians Create Ellis Island-Style Processing Station to Vet New Party Volunteers

ROCHESTER, NY — Declaring themselves champions of radical inclusion and freedom of movement, a group…

May 28, 2025

Politics

Libertarian Comes in 8th in 3-Way Race; Mathematicians Puzzled but Say the Numbers Check Out

May 27, 2025

Post-Libertarian Claims He’s Evolved Beyond Left vs. Right, Now Just Angry at Everyone Equally

May 22, 2025

Religion

Anglican Priest Accidentally Preaches Entire Sermon from The Silmarillion; Congregation Too Polite to Interrupt

May 25, 2025

Atheist Consoles Grieving Mother by Reminding Her It’s All Just a Series of Chemical Reactions

May 22, 2025

Man Who Hates Church Totally Fine with Witch Stuff for Some Reason

May 22, 2025

Latest News

Neoliberal Friend Says U.S. Foreign Policy ‘Generally Goes Pretty Well’ Despite Trail of Smoldering Craters

1 Min Read

Man Derives Meaning from Life by Explaining That Life Has No Meaning

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New Strategy Proposed: Libertarians Urged to Maybe Not Put Biggest Weirdos Front and Center; Roundly Rejected, Immediately Booed

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Libertarian Shocked by 27th Straight Election Loss After Spending Entire Campaign Giving Speeches to Other Libertarians

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Pragmatic Libertarian Shocked to Learn He’s Just as Annoying in Government as Out of It

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Longtime Libertarian Committee Member Launches Into Tirade Over 25-Year Ballot Access Failure, Blames New Guy for “Bad Optics”

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Woman Threatens to Ruin Her Own Life Until Living Wage Guaranteed to All Workers

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Libertarian Party Officials Celebrate “Perfect” County Platform, Shocked to Discover Everyone Still Finds Them Unlikable

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