Dregs Report

Woman with Go-Getter Attitude Crushed by Single Libertarian Party Affiliate Meeting

CANTON, GA — Local marketing professional and self-described “doer” Tessa Marks, 33, entered her first Libertarian Party affiliate meeting Wednesday…

May 22, 2025

Libertarian Party Devastated to Lose Ballot Access for Race They Had No One Running In

International Affairs Grad Student Takes on Six-Figure Debt to Learn to Hate Russia

Couple Who Take Edibles and Order Uber Eats Every Night Say They Don’t Want Kids Because Their Life Is “Already Full”

Wife of Professional Marxist Slips in Yet Another Passive-Aggressive Jab at Middle-Class Friends for Having Money

Atheist Consoles Grieving Mother by Reminding Her It’s All Just a Series of Chemical Reactions

Man Who Hates Church Totally Fine with Witch Stuff for Some Reason

Must Read

International Affairs Grad Student Takes on Six-Figure Debt to Learn to Hate Russia

May 22, 2025

Christian Open Mic Night Erupts After One Comic Repeats “Atheists Be Debatin’” for Five Straight Minutes

May 22, 2025

Podcaster Claims He Was Shadowbanned, Actually Just Super Boring

May 22, 2025

World Leaders Revealed to Be Ageless Demonic Entities Sustained by Human Suffering; Your Neoliberal Friend Says “That’s a Good Thing, Actually”

May 23, 2025

Libertarian Shocked by 27th Straight Election Loss After Spending Entire Campaign Giving Speeches to Other Libertarians

SPRINGFIELD, IL — Gerald Whitmore, 68, a buttoned-up libertarian fixture who has been running for…

May 22, 2025

Politics

Defense Think Tank Analyst Casually Refers to Eastern Europe as “The Chessboard” at Happy Hour

May 22, 2025

Neoliberal Friend Says U.S. Foreign Policy ‘Generally Goes Pretty Well’ Despite Trail of Smoldering Craters

May 23, 2025

Religion

Anglican Priest Accidentally Preaches Entire Sermon from The Silmarillion; Congregation Too Polite to Interrupt

May 25, 2025

Man Derives Meaning from Life by Explaining That Life Has No Meaning

May 22, 2025

Mega Church Unveils Drive-Thru Baptism for Busy Believers on the Go

May 22, 2025

Latest News

Local Libertarian Announces Bold Plan to “Outreach to the Urban Community” While Pulling Pants Up to Just Below Nipples

3 Min Read

College Student Takes Someone’s Seat, Performs Land Acknowledgment to Justify It

2 Min Read

Woman Threatens to Ruin Her Own Life Until Living Wage Guaranteed to All Workers

2 Min Read

Man Blames Loneliness on Capitalist Alienation, Still Hasn’t Washed Sheets in Seven Months

2 Min Read

Thomas Massie Suggests Returning to Spending Levels From Just Five Minutes Ago; Republicans Denounce Him as Lunatic Extremist

2 Min Read

Libertarian Group Chat Leaked, Members Revealed to Be Even Bigger Nerds Than Anyone Thought Possible

2 Min Read

Libertarian Chapter Celebrates Another Month of Uncompromised Purity After Rejecting All Newcomers

2 Min Read

Libertarian Affiliate Applauds Year of Denunciations, Procedural Drama, and No Observable Impact

3 Min Read