Defense Think Tank Analyst Casually Refers to Eastern Europe as “The Chessboard” at Happy Hour
ARLINGTON, VA — During what was meant to be a casual after-work…
College Marxist Assumes Yet Another Ethnic Identity
BERKELEY, CA — Undergraduate student and campus Marxist Blake Renner, 21, has…
Pragmatic Libertarian Shocked to Learn He’s Just as Annoying in Government as Out of It
WESTWOOD HILLS, MO — Newly elected libertarian Councilman Derek Mallon, 38, was…
Libertarian Party Officials Celebrate “Perfect” County Platform, Shocked to Discover Everyone Still Finds Them Unlikable
CANTON, OH — After months of heated debate, subcommittee reports, and late-night…
Libertarian Party Devastated to Lose Ballot Access for Race They Had No One Running In
ATLANTA, GA — Members of the state Libertarian Party affiliate expressed profound…
Local Libertarian Announces Bold Plan to “Outreach to the Urban Community” While Pulling Pants Up to Just Below Nipples
SPRINGFIELD, MO — Longtime Libertarian Party committee member and self-appointed outreach strategist…
Woman with Go-Getter Attitude Crushed by Single Libertarian Party Affiliate Meeting
CANTON, GA — Local marketing professional and self-described “doer” Tessa Marks, 33,…
Local Tankie Sues for Defamation Using Legal System They Publicly Denounce as Bourgeois Tool of Oppression
PHILADELPHIA, PA — Local Marxist-Leninist activist Cass Freeman, 26, has filed a…
Libertarian Chapter Celebrates Another Month of Uncompromised Purity After Rejecting All Newcomers
MINNEAPOLIS, MN — The local Libertarian Party affiliate is celebrating yet another…
Woke Dweeb Wins “Post-Libertarian Recruiter of the Year” for Turning Off Dozens of Normal People Every Month
MADISON, WI — Local Libertarian Party member Avery Quinn, 40, was awarded…